10 Things I Will Tell My Daughter About Love and Marriage (What Would You Tell Yours?)

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Wife's baby picture!

Unfortunately I lost my mother at a very young age. I try not to focus on the void her passing left in my life, but sometimes I do wonder what it would have been like to grow up with her by my side sharing her love and wisdom.

She was a woman who fell in love, got married, and handled life’s ups and downs with pride and grace. I’d give anything to know what advice she would have shared with me when I met the man I knew I’d love like no other, on the day he asked me to marry him, or the moment right before I said I do on my wedding day.

I’ve imagined many different versions of how the conversation would play out. My favorite is the one where she tells me to love fiercely and fearlessly with all my heart and to put my faith in God and my efforts into my marriage. It’s my favorite because it’s what I plan to tell my daughter or son, should I be blessed enough to have one in the future. I’m not a mother just yet, but I know when that day comes I’ll be overjoyed to have the honor of being the one to introduce them to the world and to hold their hand as they learn life’s easy and hard lessons.

I wrote this letter for my future daughter…

Dear (Future) Daughter,

You’re going to hear a lot of things about love and marriage before you’re ready to understand them. That’s okay. That’s what you have me for. There’s more to tell and teach you than one letter could ever hold, but for starters, here are a few things I need you to remember most, and understand early.

1. Love is going to kick your ass before it helps you up.
2. Not every man who says he loves you will mean it – in fact, most won’t.
3. The first time you think you’re in love, you probably aren’t. (Sorry!)
4. If he doesn’t know what he has, don’t wait around for him to realize it.
5. Marry the man who loves you as much as he loves his mother.
6. If you don’t respect yourself, he won’t respect you.
7. Sex can wait, but one day (like when you’re older and married) it will be important. Handle it with care.
8. If a friend’s dating life is a hot mess, she’s not the one to take advice from – ever!
9. If he loves you he’ll want the best for you – even if it means he loses.
10. If he asks you to marry him and you feel any hesitation before you answer, say no. Marriage is a lifelong commitment and no man should rush you to it.

Okay, enough for now. We will certainly talk more about this. Oh, and never forget. I’m here for ANY question on your mind. Even the hard ones! That’s what mom’s are for.

What would or will you tell your daughter? Share your advice below. (If you blog about it, be sure to let me know and share the link!)

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15 Responses to 10 Things I Will Tell My Daughter About Love and Marriage (What Would You Tell Yours?)

  1. What a fantastic post! You need to frame this!

  2. I will tell my daughters, do not ever think you can mold a man into your dream husband. You and your husband will grow together and compliment each other. I guarantee your king awaits you somewhere…no rush.
    My recent post Your Loss Defines Me

  3. Alisha says:

    Great list, especially #3!

  4. Amber says:

    Beautiful! I will pass on many of the same sentiments onto my little girl. Parents are your first teachers about love: what it means, how it feels, and how it should be. Those lessons can only begin with a strong and healthy marriage.

  5. Fantastic post! There are so many truths to love that we don't want to hear. I pray my future daughter will understand and not be hurt by the wrong type of love.
    My recent post Holiday Dress Time!

  6. nylse says:

    Love yourself first and know your worth!
    My recent post Hard Times

  7. This is a beautiful post and wonderful list…
    My recent post I'm Not Ready to Die…she said..

  8. bossygirl1980 says:

    I love this!!!! You're making me think what I would say to my daughter!! #sigh

  9. Great letter. I'll write one to my future daughter and son. They need to hear it from me (and/or their father) before they hear it from someone else.
    My recent post Laid Off No More?

  10. Mrs_Mommy_MD says:

    This is beautiful. It's great to start thinking about these things now so you don't forget…and kids grow up so fast. This would be an awesome gift to her…
    My recent post Weekend Re-Cap: Football and Birthdays

  11. Darren Miller says:

    The first thing I will tell my daughter, having experienced these issues with my girlfriend's mum, is that it doesn't matter what race, nationality, social class or how rich he is, if he makes you happy and loves you unconditionally, then he is right for you.

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  14. natalie says:

    Thank you and God
    Bless you

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