When I turned thirty in September (Virgos baby!), I became obsessed with all those online lists of the things every woman should have by the big 3-0. Proudly, I admit, I was able to check off quite a few of the most common ones – sexy little black dress, a skincare regimen, more than one ex, etc. – but I didn’t earn an A+. No worries, really. No unique woman fits any one list, I say. However, I did start to think about the sort of tools a 30-something wife oughta have under her belt when she hits that milestone age. Hence, this little list was born. If you tied the knot before thirty, I welcome your feedback. If you didn’t or haven’t, no judgments here – although, this list probably isn’t for you. (Don’t hate me.) That said, you can still weigh in too.

A Recipe that Will Make Her Husband Forgive Her for Anything
Admittedly, I’m still working on this one – I’m domestically challenged! – but, many wives have recommended I have one, so there must be something to it, right?

A Secret (or Not-So Secret) Account for Impulsive Shop Therapy
I don’t believe in “hiding” cash from your spouse, but I’m fully in support of enjoying what’s left of your paycheck after you and hubby have combined funds to take care of all household expenses, saving and beyond. Sliding a little bit of that remaining money aside and into an account he can’t see never hurt anyone. To me, it just means hearing “that bag cost how much?!” a few less times a season. (Wink!)

A Great Mattress (With Room for You Too!)
I don’t know about the sleeping arrangements in your bedroom, but in ours, my husband and dog both sleep like there’s no one else in bed but them. This inevitably leaves very little room for mama. Back when we had a crappy full (yes full!) sized mattress this was absolutely unbearable. But, when we splurged on an upgraded, queen-sized, pillow-top mattress, suddenly that all changed overnight. I still think my husband sleeps like he’s making a snow-angel and our dog doesn’t realize she’s not a toddler, but at least there’s room for me and falling asleep happens fast enough for me to barely notice.

A Go-To Foundation that Doesn’t Love Your Husband’s Shirt
I’ve learned this one the hard way. The cheaper the makeup, the friendlier it is with your clothes, and his. The nights I want to look the best are usually the same ones I want to spend snuggled up with my husband in a restaurant booth or something. Honestly, all foundations rub off at some point, but some are worse than others and you know it. I have found a few foundations that allow me to be confident enough to buy my husband white shirts as Christmas gifts again, so I know you can too.

A Happy Place
The mall. Home Goods. The spa….Your bestie’s house. I really don’t care where you go to find your zen moment and bask in it, just know where it is and how to get there fast when you need to.

A Friend Who Truly Never Gets Tired of Hearing You Vent
It’s true. Marriage really does have its ups and downs, and when the roller coaster has you raging down a steep, seemingly endless hill, you will need a kind shoulder to call on. Know whom it belongs to and appreciate the gift that is pure, kind, non-judgmental friendship at its very finest. Continue reading →