Let me first just say that I adore my marriage and my husband more than a blog post could ever express and I absolutely could not in any way shape or form imagine my life without him in it. That being said, I must confess that lately I’m feeling what I’m going to call the “marriage squeeze hold” on my life and I’m finding it a little bit hard to deal with at times. Because I am one half of “us” lately it feels like there are so many things that I want to do for us that I can’t seem to find the time for me.
Sure, my husband is super supportive of my individuality, but I’m learning that having the support alone is not enough to get you to the point where you take the inch you’re given. If I had a dollar for every time he said “Baby, go ahead and blog, or go get your hair done, I’m just going to hang out” and I said “I could but then I wouldn’t see you before bed and it’s important to spend time together” I’d be loaded. I had a real “aha” moment the other day in the nail salon regarding these little feelings I’d been harboring. I got in the chair and the lady looked at my feet and said, “oh no! big job!” I was mortified at the thought of just how right she was, even if she was a little rude in going about it. I hadn’t had a pedicure since my wedding – NO JOKE! We’ve been married for six months now! It’s not that I haven’t done anything I wanted to do since saying “I do” but I don’t think I’ve done enough of it to feed my soul the “me time” nutrients it really needs.
The truth is sometimes there feels like there’s an invisible force pulling you toward your marriage, even if in fact the person you’re married to is encouraging you to spread your wings and fly. I have a book that I’ve been trying to write for over 7 months now and I can’t figure out for the life of me why I haven’t gotten past chapter two. On one hand, I’ve been putting a good amount of effort into making my marriage as healthy and as happy as can be, and I’ve seen the payoff in that department. On the other hand, I’m not sure that right now I am as happy as I can be. If I were shopping my book around to publishers I would be – that’s for sure. So, why the heck can’t I just pull myself away from love long enough to remember to do the things I love? I don’t have an answer for this one ladies, but I would like to pose the question. Have you had success in doing this? Will you share your secrets? Do I sound selfish? When you’re married when do you find the time for yourself you need, and do you take it when it’s offered?