Can you believe how much the whole topic keeps coming up? We keep hearing, “So when are you guys getting pregnant?” or “Is the baby on the way yet?” It’s a riot! Even when I’m around friends the conversation usually goes something like, Me: “I’m tired!” Them: “OMG! Do you think you might be pregnant?” I guess when you get married people assume that somewhere at the bottom of your marriage license in fine print it says “you’re also now perfectly ready to and capable of having kids”. Well, I don’t see that clause anywhere on ours. And can I just say that it’s such a relief that you feel the same way?
The other day we laughed at how disappointed people seem when we say we’re not there yet. The last time I checked, they won’t be getting up three times a night or changing poopy diapers – we will! We’ve talked about this a thousand times since we’ve been together and you and I agree that we do want kids, but right now we want to focus on our dreams a little more. I told you that being a mom is one of the things I most look forward to in my life and I meant that. Even if other people think we just want to “live it up” a little longer and avoid the responsibility of it all, you and I both know that it’s a lot deeper than that. We know ourselves best, and we know how much time and energy it’s taking us to get a hold of our dreams right now. I want to publish my books. You want to start a family business and go back to school. Despite what other people say we can’t forget that these are not bad reasons to wait on being parents. You’re only 30 and I’m only 28. Though we know so many incredible parents our age, that doesn’t mean it has to be our time. Lucky for us, we have their kids — our godchildren, nieces, and nephews — to love.
I know sometimes you question whether or not you’ll regret our decision to wait, and that’s okay. I think it makes you human honey. For what it’s worth, I don’t think we’ll have any regrets. So you may be a little too old to play one-on-one on the courts with your son for hours without passing out, or I may be totting around an infant while my girlfriend’s kids are off at summer camp – who cares!?! We will be able to tell our children that the reason we’re so focused on them and their growth and happiness and can provide for them so well is because we waited and that was the right decision for us. We’ll tell them we made a tough decision to delay their entrances into this world until we were certain we were up for the job, and could do it well. I think when they’re old enough to get it, they will. (Assuming they even question why their cousins are in college and they’re just in middle school. Ha!)
Anyway, I just want you to know that I feel good about our decision, and I’m relieved that you do too. I also want you to know that I’m busting my butt to get what I feel I need to get done so that I can be ready when that clock starts ticking, and I believe that you are doing the same. I also want you to know that if for any reason we find out we’re going to be parents a little sooner than we’d hoped, I will still be overjoyed and I think we’ll be awesome at it just the same. We’ll also still be able to make our dreams come true. The roads to our individual success won’t close, they’ll just have detour signs posted that say, “Kid Friendly Route This Way”. Okay? Love you!