Love Homework: Can You Answer These 6 Questions About Your Man?

Sure you know his middle name, which drawer he keep his socks in, and how he takes his coffee – all pluses, of course – but after 8 years with the same guy, I’m finding that the more you love, the more you learn about “the other things” that make up a man. You know, the stuff he couldn’t ever tell you – it’s what you observe and what his heart ultimately reveals when he’s often not even paying attention. My husband and I call them The Tell-Tell Things. When you figure ‘em out about your partner you feel something shift and change within your relationship. You feel things getting deeper and the love growing to new heights. Your bond strengthens right before your eyes. It’s a beautiful feeling.

I want to say that you’ll know it when it hits you, but in case you missed it, I believe that if you can answer some (or all) of the below questions about your man, you’ve hit these relationship milestone, and more. Take a look and see what you come up with.

1. Can you tell the difference between when he’s telling a little white lie to protect you or just telling a little white lie? What are his “tells”?

2. What is he truly afraid of, but doesn’t even realize he fears?

3. If he wakes up in the middle of the night and can’t fall back to sleep, what is he sitting in the dark thinking about?

4. What will he most want to teach his son about being a man? Why?

5. What damage was done by the woman who broke his heart before you came along to fix it?

6. Is he more afraid of losing you or losing himself?

They’re deep, I know. But I promise you, there’s a love lesson buried within the words of any answer you have for these questions. That lesson could be a cautionary tale, inspiration for why your love works as well as it does, or possibly even a building block in the strong foundation you’ve built for your relationship, together.

Feel free to share your answers/inspiration below.

Posted in Love Homework, Married Life, Wifey Wisdom | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments

A Lesson Learned: Sometimes Love Is Annoying (Deal With It)

Before you get married, you hear way more about how to make the good days stretch than what to do when you have really bad ones. I get that. It’s an exciting time, and people want to stick to the positive. (There’s plenty of time to scare us later, right?) But, in all seriousness, marriage is the only “class” I’ve ever enrolled in where I actually learn something new every single day. The lessons just keep coming — whether I finish my homework or not. Marriage is fascinating like that. I don’t always like what it’s teaching me, but make no mistake, I’m always happy to learn – Man is too. I’m thankful for that, and I’m writing today to share one of the recent and extremely valuable lessons we’ve survived and conquered (we think!) lately with the hopes it will resonate with you in some way — be it that you’ve been there, done that, and can share some wisdom or maybe you’re not quite there yet, but will find it helpful in the future. Okay, so, grab your notebooks; here are the “Cliffs Notes”. Continue reading

Posted in Learning the Hard Way, Married Life | Tagged , , , , , | 4 Comments

4 (Very Important) Things to Remember on Valentine’s Day


YOU’RE LOVED BY SOMEONE

You don’t need to be someone’s Valentine to be “loved” today, or any day. Somewhere, somehow, somebody loves you. I refused to believe it isn’t so. Maybe they haven’t ever told you, or maybe they have, but just not enough for your standards. It doesn’t matter. What does, is that they’ve cleared out a special little corner in their heart just for you, and no one else. Still can’t think of anyone out there who loves you? I don’t buy it, because you’re overlooking the most important person of all – yourself. Love yourself, always.

IT’S WHAT COMES FROM THE HEART THAT COUNTS

If someone you love says, does, or gives, something that makes you smile today, they’ve succeeded in sharing the love on Valentine’s Day. It doesn’t matter what it cost them, or how many women at your job received overpriced arrangements today – true love don’t cost a thing. Never forget that!

IT’S JUST A DAY

A day meant to celebrate love should never bring you sadness or pain. If you catch those feelings seeping in, revoke them, now. Life’s short, and today’s even shorter. Twenty-four hours will be over before you know it, and you should not waste them feeling bad. It’s just another day.

SAYING “I LOVE YOU” IS ENOUGH

Don’t stress about how to show the one you love some love today. These three words should do the trick: I love you. Enough said.

Posted in Happy Holidays, Hot Topics, Wifey Wisdom | Tagged , , , , , , | 6 Comments

Why Whitney Houston’s Music Is (The Other) Love of My Life

I’m such a huge Whitney Houston fan that although news of her death broke almost 24-hours ago, I’m just now pulling it together enough to attempt to write this post. Before you write me off as a fanatic, just listen.

Whitney’s music has been a staple in my life since childhood. Everyone says they grew up on Whitney, but, I really, really did. They say that a person uniquely identifies with the music they listen to frequently during pivotal points in their lives, particularly their young adult years. That explains it all. You see, my mother, who died when I was nine and whom I miss every day, worked almost an hour away from where we lived. When I wasn’t in school, my grandmother and I would drop her off in the mornings and pick her up each evening, so that we’d have access to a car during the day. That was four hours a day I spent on the road, two of which were with both of the most important women in my life, all of which were spent listening to Whitney’s first and second albums in full rotation. Continue reading

Posted in Hot Topics, Totally Random | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 16 Comments

Ladies, Are Flowers All You Need to Feel Sexy on Valentine’s Day?

Okay, I confess. I’m one of those people who only watch the Superbowl for the commercials. You die-hard sports fans don’t get to judge me, okay? Great. Now, did you catch the commercials last night? As usual, there were hits and misses, but I really hope you caught this one. It’s from Teleflora, the flower retail giant, who had a message for all men out there who fear royally screwing up Valentine’s Day: Great flowers are all it takes to make her happy, Happy Valentine’s Night. I smirked when I saw this one, but apparently many commercial critics (yes, they’re blogging about it already) weren’t so amused. Some accused the super sexy commercial of insinuating that men can pay for sex, well, with flowers.

Now granted, I honestly thought it was a Victoria’s Secret commercial until the company’s logo came up in the final seconds, but once I figured it out, as a wife, that wasn’t what I got at all. When I ended, I immediately thought, well, hey, sometimes it really is the little things that often send the biggest messages, right? If my husband could pick out a flower arrangement as sexy as the one they showed in this commercial (which will of course, cost a pretty penny to have delivered to me on Valentine’s Day), it would certainly put me in the mood. Continue reading

Posted in Happy Holidays, Hot Topics, News and Notes, Viral Videos | Tagged , , , , , , | 3 Comments

4 Practically Free Ways to Celebrate Valentine’s Day Together

Our little guide to spending less and loving more this Valentine’s Day.

Make Each Other Cards
You could do what the corporate giants at Hallmark want you to, and go and buy each other six-dollar Valentine’s Day cards written from other people’s hearts. Or, you can unleash some creativity and open your heart and see what comes out. You don’t have to go the kindergarten route and make a glue, glitter, and construction paper mess – think outside the box. One year I made my husband a custom photo card, another I types a poem and framed it, and this year I’m planning to make a new card out of my favorite parts of the old ones he’s given me. Doesn’t matter how it looks as long as it comes from the heart.

Get Lost Together
For us, this one is an oldie but goodie. Hoping in the car armed with snacks and a navigational system for backup, when we first started dating one of our favorite things to do was just get lost together. A car ride with the right music and no destination can be just as romantic as any four course meal, promise. Get off early, get in your ride and just enjoy the open road and each other. Your destination doesn’t matter. Just be sure you know how to get back home by bedtime. Continue reading

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Posted in Enjoy Your Marriage, Gift Guides, Great Dates, Happy Holidays | Tagged , , , , , , , | 6 Comments