10 Things Every Married Woman Should Have by Age 30

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checklist imageWhen I turned thirty in September (Virgos baby!), I became obsessed with all those online lists of the things every woman should have by the big 3-0. Proudly, I admit, I was able to check off quite a few of the most common ones – sexy little black dress, a skincare regimen, more than one ex, etc. – but I didn’t earn an A+. No worries, really. No unique woman fits any one list, I say. However, I did start to think about the sort of tools a 30-something wife oughta have under her belt when she hits that milestone age. Hence, this little list was born. If you tied the knot before thirty, I welcome your feedback. If you didn’t or haven’t, no judgments here – although, this list probably isn’t for you. (Don’t hate me.) That said, you can still weigh in too.

A Recipe that Will Make Her Husband Forgive Her for Anything
Admittedly, I’m still working on this one – I’m domestically challenged! – but, many wives have recommended I have one, so there must be something to it, right?

A Secret (or Not-So Secret) Account for Impulsive Shop Therapy
I don’t believe in “hiding” cash from your spouse, but I’m fully in support of enjoying what’s left of your paycheck after you and hubby have combined funds to take care of all household expenses, saving and beyond. Sliding a little bit of that remaining money aside and into an account he can’t see never hurt anyone. To me, it just means hearing “that bag cost how much?!” a few less times a season. (Wink!)

A Great Mattress (With Room for You Too!)
I don’t know about the sleeping arrangements in your bedroom, but in ours, my husband and dog both sleep like there’s no one else in bed but them. This inevitably leaves very little room for mama. Back when we had a crappy full (yes full!) sized mattress this was absolutely unbearable. But, when we splurged on an upgraded, queen-sized, pillow-top mattress, suddenly that all changed overnight. I still think my husband sleeps like he’s making a snow-angel and our dog doesn’t realize she’s not a toddler, but at least there’s room for me and falling asleep happens fast enough for me to barely notice.

A Go-To Foundation that Doesn’t Love Your Husband’s Shirt
I’ve learned this one the hard way. The cheaper the makeup, the friendlier it is with your clothes, and his. The nights I want to look the best are usually the same ones I want to spend snuggled up with my husband in a restaurant booth or something. Honestly, all foundations rub off at some point, but some are worse than others and you know it. I have found a few foundations that allow me to be confident enough to buy my husband white shirts as Christmas gifts again, so I know you can too.

A Happy Place
The mall. Home Goods. The spa….Your bestie’s house. I really don’t care where you go to find your zen moment and bask in it, just know where it is and how to get there fast when you need to.

A Friend Who Truly Never Gets Tired of Hearing You Vent
It’s true. Marriage really does have its ups and downs, and when the roller coaster has you raging down a steep, seemingly endless hill, you will need a kind shoulder to call on. Know whom it belongs to and appreciate the gift that is pure, kind, non-judgmental friendship at its very finest.

A Cocktail or Wine You Can Count On
Now, I’m not encouraging alcoholism or bar hopping here, but the right drink can remedy more bullshit than most medicines. Know your drink of choice and don’t be afraid to add it to your weekly grocery list.

A Sexy Lingerie Set that Will Make Her Husband Forgive Her for Anything
Does this need an explanation? Invest, ladies!

Life Insurance Policies
Death of a spouse is not something anyone likes to plan for, but it’s not something you ever want to be unprepared for either. We’re in the process of getting this together presently. One thing we’ve learned so far: It’s far more affordable the sooner you open the policies, and there are so many options out there that it’s worth taking your time, doing the research and choosing wisely.

A Cute Pair of Shoes She Can Take On Anything In
From daylong errand runs to back-to-back friends’ kid’s birthday parties, sometimes weekends are unavoidably exhausting. It’s tempting to cop out and sport sneakers or boots all day, but if you must look the part, it pays to have a pair of shoes that are truly fabulous and comfortable too. I know. I know. They’re tough to find. Believe me, I get it. But seek and eventually ye shall find at least one pair. And, when you do, cherish them!

BONUS: A Mature Display of Your Wedding Photos/Kids Photos In Your Home
Lose the scrapbooks and visit a frame shop. It’s worth it, I promise.

What would you add to my list? By all means, let’s keep this conversation going below!

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16 Responses to 10 Things Every Married Woman Should Have by Age 30

  1. Very good advice. I'm still single though. I'm working on finding out the "how to get a guy to want to be your boyfriend" advice. Even in the single life though that wine and happy place mean so much. Oh, and that impulsive shop therapy money means a lot too.

  2. teamtimberance says:

    Ooohh….WOW!! This list was amazing!! What a fun topic. You came back with a splash!!

    Hmmm…..I'd add to the lingerie one, casual loungewear your hubby appreciates. I have my girly, youngish thick pajamas with pink stripes or bunnies…and of course the required grown-up kind. But what I never expected was to know my husband appreciates a good basketball short or off-the-shoulder sweatshirt too!!!

  3. Rosemary says:

    My husband is a big guy, and he had a king-sized mattress even before we met. It costs a little more and the sheets are more expensive. But it is SOOOO worth it. Plenty of room for all arms and legs, a couple of cats, and a bunch of extra pillows.
    My recent post Be Spontaneous!

  4. Pingback: 10 Things Every Married Woman Should Have By Age 30 | Black and Married With Kids.com - A Positive Image of Marriage and Family

  5. Shaquaya says:

    Love this, Charli! Not totally in your target demographic but as a nearly 30 year-old who's been shacking up for a while (tick, tock), I concur on all accounts. I was definitely waiting for you to spill the tea on your picks for good foundation though. Don't be stingy. Share with your girl! :)

  6. Charity says:

    I got married at 21, so for me the sex got better with age, ladies, you must have an alter ego in the bedroom. Nothing that will scare him, but just something he’s not used to. Oh, and not every time. Sneak it in every once in a while;)

  7. Shelly says:

    The "best friend" and the "happy place" are too things that I absolutely must have. The trick for me was to let myself indulge in time with them without feeling guilty.

  8. sinkoo says:

    My husband is a big guy, and he had a king-sized mattress even before we met. It costs a little more and the sheets are more expensive. The "best friend" and the "happy place" are too things that I absolutely must have.

  9. Rae says:

    I have been married for 25 years. Yes, I got married years before I turned 30, in fact I was married and had my first baby by 30. I don't agree with at least have of your list. I think by the time you turn 35 your list will be different. First, I have always had a King sized bed. In my opinion, dogs don't belong in the bed between a husband and wife. It is good to have a best friend but if that friend is not married she may not give the best advice…it is best to get advice about marriage from someone who is also married. Lastly, it is nothing wrong with having cute dress or lingerie but your personal growth and well being should begin to be so much more than that, such as working on a spiritual walk, saving money, investments,etc…..

  10. 40years says:

    Your spiritual walk is first, a pastor, medical/life insurance,doctor, & lawyer

  11. Robyn says:

    Very nice, pretty funny too :). Just started blogging at robyncae.com, take a look and judge me harshly!

  12. A.ISH says:

    I'm still working on a couple of these, but for the most part, I've got this! LOL Great article!
    My recent post Married Sleeping Separate

  13. SAM says:

    A nice comfortable queen mattress is a must. Just make sure you select one that both of you will like.

    beautyrest mattress review
    My recent post Crib Size Mattress Dimensions

  14. Anthony L says:

    I have to say my wife is lucky to have most of these things done : )

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