The Other Women In Your Husband’s Life: Appropriate vs Get Real Lady

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I’ve blogged in the past about my total willingness to accept that my husband has a “work wife” in his life. I know her. I trust her. And, she has proven time and time again to have both his back and OUR back! (That’s three thumbs-up in my book.) That said, there are a few other women he has encountered through his work life that I’d much rather not hear about ever again. I won’t go into too many details (I’m aware many of his co-workers, both past and present, could possibly be reading this, and he doesn’t need the drama!) but I’m going to sum it up with a few thoughts that will get you to where I’m headed with this, and then you can tell me what you think…


If You Want to Be His “Friend”, You Should Want to Know Me Too!

I cannot tell you how many times my husband has come home talking about a new female co-worker buddy he chats with on the job who used this phrase: “Oh Please, I know you’re married. I just want to be your friend!” Then, they always follow up this bull with the same telltale mistakes. They are as follows: They never ask about me, or us; just him. They’re conveniently nowhere to be found when I’m around the job or suddenly “shy” when he’s with me at the office holiday party. Get real, lady! You don’t want to be his friend; you want more. I showed my husband how to spot the signs long ago, and we still laugh together at these so called “buddies” and how quickly they fade away when they realize he’s happy at home and staying there.

If You Have A Man of Your Own, Don’t Rely On Mine!

I’m 100-percent not cool with a female “friend” of my husband’s calling on him in their time of need. Money problems? Kids wrecking your nerves? Need “to talk”? I don’t care! That’s not his job, nor is it the role he should be playing in your life. He has already been cast as the main man I depend on in my life. Get a new script, and get real lady!

Now, my husband is usually on board with these typical tricks of the trade, but every now and then we find ourselves “discussing” how he should or shouldn’t “let down” a female co-worker nicely – and if you ask me, we spend way too much time hashing it out. For me, it’s simple: I’m okay with you having a few female friends that aren’t me, but there are rules that must be followed. 1. If she was your friend long before you’d ever even laid eyes on me, I won’t dispute that bond. 2. Don’t call her a “friend” if she hasn’t earned that title; and trust me, earning it takes way more than just providing good conversation on your lunch break or offering to get you coffee. And, 3. You just don’t need many female friends in your life if you have a best friend like me, so you better pick wisely, buddy! Okay? Okay…now no more talk about these women, please!

Oh, and one other thing: I should note that in my adult lifetime, I’ve had a total of six really close, totally-like-my-brother-100-percent-platonic type guy friends — four of which I met and knew B.H. (Before Hubby). At the present time, I only have three left, two of which are as gay as they come, and the last up and moved all the way across the country to Los Angeles and says he’s never coming back because he loves it there. In short: I do meet nice guys, quite often, and we keep it friendly in passing. But, I don’t personally make it a habit to put any real effort into increasing the number of male “buddies” in my life. I just don’t see the point. My husband is my best friend and the others have enough awesomeness to go around. The majority of the straight men I interact with on a daily basis outside of the office “belong” to a close friend of mine (wink!) and we’re on a double date, or they’re family. Case closed!

Ladies, can you feel me on this one? What are your thoughts on the “other women” in his life? Any gripes? What are your “rules” and expectations? Think I’m crazy? Whatever…let’s discuss!

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86 Responses to The Other Women In Your Husband’s Life: Appropriate vs Get Real Lady

  1. Ronni says:

    I love this post! I feel you all the way!

  2. Kenda says:

    I totally agree with this post. I do not get down with new female friends trying to be all friendly with my guy. That is not the business.

    • ManWifeDog says:

      I think sometimes it's the "co-workers" who feel they have an advantage. No matter what, they get to see him every day. (Whether we like it or not.) They think it's the inside track!

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    • verticus says:

      I know other women are going to be in your man's life…and I understand that some of them were around before you two even knew each other…but how do you deal with the ones that you have those womanly intuitions about who don't respond when you're trying to be friends with them too, who think it's okay to turn to their "big brother" (when you can tell that's NOT how it is with her entirely), etc.? I don't want to make him feel like he has to pick between me and his friend, but how is it fair that I just have to "deal with it" that she has more than friendly feelings for my husband, even if he doesn't see it? ='(

  3. MellM says:

    There's a thin line when making new friends of the opposite sex in relationships. On one hand, you don't want to stifle your partner and make them nervous or drive them to be secretive about who they are meeting and befriending. On the other, you don't want to be naive. Your partner may have the best intentions and that other person may or may not have malicious intent, but setting some ground rules in the first place is a perfect way to prevent "misunderstandings" about what type of conduct is expected of a SO.

    • ManWifeDog says:

      VERY good point. I tell my husband all the time that first and foremost I appreciate his honesty. I wouldn't know about any f this if he didn't tell me…you know? That said, occasionally I do have to watch where I step. Sometimes I go on and on and on about it and he has that "uh-oh, I never should have said anything face on." Know that one?

  4. Sophia says:

    I had to teach my husband about female "friends" long ago. Now he is a pro at spotting the raggedy ones and shuts them down immediately. Great post. Thanks for sharing.

  5. LOVE this. Charli, you are ALWAYS on point with your posts. Thank you for keeping it real…once again. :)
    My recent post The Balance between Contentment and Ambition

  6. Eszti says:

    It is always a really hard thing to handle these situations, but I think after 10 years of marriage I already can handle this. I know that my husband is interested in other ladies as well, but I trust him and I know he won't cheat on me… so why be angry?
    My recent post Fogp�tl�s K�z�p-Kelet-Eur�p�ban

  7. blissfulwife says:

    Amen sister! Great post!! So true!!
    Nicki G. http://www.blissfulvida.com

  8. Tonia says:

    I agree 100% and I am single. I only have 2 male friends straight up platonic …no hanky panky with either, but then one of them is gay (LOL) It seems that you guys have communicated well and have an understanding and communication is key.
    My recent post LOVE FOR GABBY!

  9. Michelle says:

    Ha ha! I always refer to my boss as my work husband. He has me checking to see if his tie is straight, picking up his lunch etc. His wife is nice but I know she gets tired of his over night hours. He gets a room across the street because it's crazy busy this season.

    I wouldn't want my husband to have a work "wife". He'd have to get another profession or a male work "wife" LOL
    My recent post Summer Is Leaving But Keep Wearing Sunscreen

  10. My husband only has 2 "other women" in his life: his mom and one of his friends that he knew before me, and me & her are cool. I don't expect any new ones to come around, mostly because hubby doesn't play that. He doesn't desire that potential drama, which puts me at ease. The female friend he has is really, truly, like family. Completely platonic. We were actually over her family's house for the holiday. So as far as the other women, he's not interested, and I'm not worried :) I think he could tell them off better than I can, haha.

  11. On point! I couldn’t agree more!

  12. Noel says:

    I agree that neither husband nor wife needs to actively seek out a plethora of opposite-sex friends at work or any other settings. There's a difference and space between a friend and an acquaintance. What do you think about a boyfriend who is constantly "liking" the pics of a facebook friend of opposite-sex, and the pics are usually of the fb friend dressed in outfits revealing a lot of cleavage and mini-mini skirts?

    • ManWifeDog says:

      I think it sounds like he can't keep his eyes to himself and isn't being very respectful to the woman he's with. Your cleavage and butt should be his only concern if his focus is on making you happy. :-)

  13. JazzyMac says:

    Here we go again with wives talking about the "predator" other women "stalking" your man. SMH. These conversations usually happens about once a year–like clockwork. If a man answers his "caller ID" phone in front of you…lol…much less gives out his number…then HE IS DISRESPECTING HIS FAMILY. How many female coworkers hunt down the company directory to get their "friend's" home number? Yeah right. He gave it up, and he's now playing the "victim" about this woman who just won't leave him alone. Let me tell it like this: Every guy at my job has approached me to be "friends". They are ALL married, and have been told (by me) to search elsewhere. I am usually told that I'm too uptight because I can't just "be friends"…and that I need to "live a little". lol! They all invite me out…to the local bar to watch the game (no prob), to to club for happy hour (no prob), to the running path to run (hmm…ok), to their house when their wife is working late (yeah, ok), to the jazz festival that coincidentally only they show up to (hmmmm).

    All B.S.

    I spend more time fighting off married men then I do getting approached by single men. Who knew that these married men were busy talking to their wives about the women who just can't leave them alone?? ;-)

    Any woman who is that NAIVE about their husbands needs a lesson in Biology 101 (Animal Kingdom).

    I'm not off the soapbox yet…because the season of blaming other women for their cheating husbands has just started.

    • ManWifeDog says:

      Both the women and the husbands are to blame here and I feel i made that clear. If you think there aren't as many "predators" out there as there are no-good husbands, you're either lying to yourself or blind. I think my thoughts are just that — mine. And as a wife who is having real experiences with these women I have every right to share them. I regularly share my husband's faults and imperfections as well as my own. So, your extreme anger feels out of place. I applaud you for being a woman who would never get involved with married men, but shame on you for scolding me for saying these women do exist. If you've never met a single woman up to no damn good and willing to go very, very far to get a married man's attention, than you're just not looking. They're right there standing with all those bad news men you seem to harbor so much hatred for. My article is biased toward wives just as your comment is biased toward single women who get hit on by married me. We can both have our opinions and stand firmly by them. But that said, just one side note: "Naive about their husbands needs" sounds like pretty odd wording coming from a woman who says she's never gone there and never will. I've only known women who do get involved with married men and married men who cheat to speak in terms like that. Just saying. Either way, I appreciate all the comment love as always. Since you posted this same comment on both BAMWK and my site I wanted to be sure you knew I read it. ;-)

  14. Am totally with you..I remember I felt so jealous when my husband was thinking of getting a young female secretary saying "women are more sincere and young because they are efficient." I know my husband is the last person who would get involved with his secretary; but I have to admit I was jealous even when there was only talk about getting such a secretary. Sometimes I feel I'm too possessive and insecure especially when a girl friend of mine said she's totally okay with her husband having a young, female secretary. Yet can't help feeling the smoke without fire:)
    My recent post Good news?!?!?!!!???

  15. lucas says:

    My ex husband has been living with another woman for 6 years. I was so unhappy , I tried but I don’t want other men… I tried to get him back but it didn’t work!
    i almost gave up! but i never lost hope because i know i will get him back someday and today as i am saying greatzuba@gmail.com did for me, he brought back my husband and our marriage has been in a good shape and our marriage is getting perfect like never before

  16. Rosemary says:

    I am with you on this. Too many people (both men and women) who thought they would never disrespect their marriage vows gradually drift into emotional (or physical) affairs with people who were once "just friends". Sometimes there are predatory intentions involved, but all too often it is a matter of crossing one blurry line at a time. It is vital to know exactly where the lines are drawn and then stay as far away from them as possible.
    My recent post Sex By Appopintment

  17. Gisela says:

    My husband for 5 long years had an assistant that I didn't know about who he took out to lunch, lent money to and hung out at the office with. The assistant took it upon herself to become my husband's confidante and felt she had the right to be calling my husband at all hours of the day and night to ask for advise about her kids, her relationship, even to ask for driving directions. There were long texting sessions late at night on holidays, such as Christmas Eve and New Year's Eve and not once during that time did I ever meet this woman or hear about her. Did this woman ever consider that her friend had a wife and that the wife was being excluded from their little friendship and that the man's time with his family was being interrupted by her constant calling and texting? Didn't matter to her either that when I found out about that friendship I demanded it stop because she continued emailing my husband behind my back ,or so she thought. The friendship or whatever that was has been over now for a while but I still detest that woman. Btw, not solely blaming the other woman, my husband is a dog too!

    • ManWifeDog says:

      I can imagine this was a very frustrating situation for you. I get it, I do. On one hand, I'm glad that your husband was very transparent about his actions. But did all of this continue after you asked him to cut off such intimate communication with her? Did you ask? Just curious. These women are everywhere and many of them will continue to forge ahead with close-friendships with married men, the whole time masking it as "friendship." I try to make sure my husband sees them coming a mile away and does his part when they try to work their way in. That way he won't share the blame. Communication is the key there. I'm so glad you commented and shared your story. Thanks so much for stopping by and I hope to see you around the blog again soon.

  18. stephanie says:

    I fill you on this topic, my husband has a friend that calls him any time she wants, i blame myself for letting this go on for so long.finally i told her to not call my husband as a matter of fact she has one. I also put my husband in check also.

  19. Jannice says:

    I feel as if am the one you are talking about,my man has got so many close female friends for whom i dont understand wat they share?am mad n about to quit the whole thing.

  20. A Good Wife says:

    I (hesitantly) admit that I have a possessive streak where my husband is concerned and I'm working on that. There will be no talk about a "work wife"; that just isn't funny. I've earned the wife title and it should be mine all by myself. I get the concept of the work wife, but I really really believe people shouldn't flirt with tempting situations and the work environment offers many. Setting boundaries and expectations is the way my husband and I handle opposite-sex friendships. Knowing that he is respecting these boundaries helps me a lot! I have a handful of good female friends and that's good enough for me. I make an effort to avoid close male friendships. I know how him having a close female friend makes me feel. I don't want to chance burdening him the same way.
    My recent post I *do* trust my husband

  21. Madel says:

    My husband has a female friend that in the past wanted to be more than friends, he met her when he was getting a divorce from his first wife and he said that he helped him and became his friend, They have a bond that makes me uncomfortable. I talk to him about it and every time I mention her name he gets angry with me. I tried to befriend her when I first met her but she did not accept my friendship; she would always call when she knew I wasn't around and she called one time when I was home and asked him if I was home. He says that they are just friends and that if we weren't together they will be still just friends, nothing more. I try to teach him home some female friends have other motives, specially since he says this woman agreed to be just friends. I know by the way she acts when I try to talk to her that she has other motives. I know she is the reason all of his previous relationships after his first wife failed because she was always in the picture trying to cause division between him and his girlfriend and now between him and I. Every time I try to talk about him he tells me to stop being insecure and not to mansion her anymore. I told him that I am not jealous about him and his female friend I just don't understand if she is such a good close friend why doesn't she want to get to know me. He says that she noticed that I was insecure from the first time we met and that is why she doesn't like me. I don't get that. Please can someone give me some feedback? I am not willing to give up on my husband, he is a good man but this relationship with this female friend is wearing our relationship out. If I don't mention her we are ok. but as soon as I ask anything about her, hell breaks loose. Man! I need help. Am I over reacting, Am I insecure???

    • Didi says:

      Your instincts are good. My husband of two years frequently hands over his business card to new women he meets when I am with him. One he recently met accepted his friend request in Facebook but refused to friend me, although I have known her longer than he has. He is a professor and he constantly uses that intro to generate friendly exchanges with women, even though I am with him.

  22. Wendy says:

    Hi Madel:
    What your husband is doing is unacceptable. He needs to put you as a priority as your feelings should count more than the other woman–he married you! If he is placing her more as a priority, than that is important information for you and you should be ready to put down an ultimatim and follow through with it. You deserve respect and dignity and he is playing two women off each other which is very selfish. Good luck!

  23. Marie says:

    Good article. I am fine with my husband having female friends that have no issue being friends with me. It’s when the females want to only speak to the hubbs when im not around that im offended. My hubby had a female friend with whom he had a fling with, she was supposedly his best female friend and confidant and I couldnt figure out why I was so uneasy until One day she was texting him about having her husband help him find a job. I asked my hsband if her husband knew about their past and he said no, I told him I didnt trust him to be friends with a woman who would hide that kind of thing from her husband. Sure enough when my husband told her she needed to be upfront with her husband about her past. She got defensive and said “No, dont tell B*$/^(her husbands name). That move right there let me know she was untruthful and had bad intentions whether with my husband or someone else. My husband deleted her from his phone, email, fb, and toldher they couldnt be friends. They havent spoken since and im happier that she is out the picture.

  24. Raylene says:

    My husband has female friends I get that. Before we got married when we were just engaged I found these texts back and forth where he kept telling her she was beautiful and saying I love you, calling her dear stuff like that. I confronted him about it and he insisted they were just friends. I believed him and still do. But I also took that time to explain to him that it seemed like more than a friendship. That because we were engaged I wasn't ok with him having that kind of friendship with a woman. It was inappropriate. So he deleted her from his accounts and phone etc… Later after we were married I felt bad and thought who am I to tell him who he can talk to or not talk to. So I told him I was sorry but he wasn't to talk to her in the affectionate way he used to. That all the things he says to me because he loves me he should never be saying to her. He doesn't talk to her that way anymore and I know she is unaware that I asked him to stop talking to her originally because I've read messages and I saw the excuse he gave her had nothing to do with me. Please note I've only kept an eye on the friendship they have had because it was inappropriate. But now that they have been talking for quite some time again, we are married now, she makes no effort to get to know me whatsoever and I feel insulted and I don't like the woman. I'm now pregnant and we are expecting our first child. She heard and asked him r u going to have a baby. Upon him saying yes her instant response was these words " oh my god that's insane ". Now I think typically a normal response would be a wow congratulations or an I'm happy for you – you know something along the lines of that. I am not comfortable with this woman at all anymore but I don't want to be a wife that tells him who he can talk to I'm working on being supportive of his decisions. I'm not concerned about him cheating on me, I know he won't but it bothers me that he makes such an effort to be friends with a woman that doesn't make an effort to get to know me , and doesn't seem to like or support my husband and I starting a family. He defends her when he should be defending me and how i feel. I have made him the number one person in my life not counting my two mothers ( I'm adopted) and I would always defend him over some other man close friend or not. I feel like he gets frustrated with me when I point out how she acts to him like he would rather side with her than me. I don't know what to do I am at my wits end and I need advice!!
    Anyone??

    • My heart is crushed says:

      Don't hesitate to set your down and tell him it is inappropriate to talk with this girl. you are married and going to add a little one to the family. If you don't stop it now and let him know the three of you are all he needs, you will find, one girl will turn into two, then three, etc. Tell him he chose you to marry and not her, if he no longer wants it that way you and baby will be leaving. you will have enough to worry about during pregnancy and after, he needs to support you. if he won't straighten up, get rid of him now—the longer you stay, the harder it gets. God be with you, I pray he does the right thing.

  25. Ray-ray says:

    What if he has six female friends. Three of them are ex-girlfriends.
    Before me. I use to deal with thug-ish men in the past. He was the frist with degrees So thought maybe in this circle differnet rules. . Two of them are in love with him and have made efforts not to be friend me but, request has handi man services for every thing. I figured in the beginning he would get rid of them as we get close no need to make waves if he wanted them he could easily have been with any of them. One has a close bond with the family almost like if she is the daughter in law and I am the friend. They do anything for her and correct her for nothing she does. I tryed to see it as being mature adult but, I could not one chick was calling his phone and he didnt anwser she called my phone to ask me why everytime he is with you he dont take my calls. I hung up and told him uou need to check her his response block her from your phone I was like no N word you better let her know. She anit that important and never call either of us ever wagain for crossing the line. Nope it flipped on me I am insecure immature she needed work done for her insurance. I am working for her. obviously she feel the floor because if she will call my phone that tells me that she thinks she superior to me. You know I let the crap slide. Next biggie the the we have a daughter she is born my mother passed three years before. My family is pretty big she seats with my baby daddy the whole baby shower he never even left her side. I was publicly humiliated Ben he flirted with my niece who was from out of town and staying with us and he inappropriately talked and played and flirted with her the whole time she was there. When I talked to him about it insecure immature paranoid sick in the head getting angry with me. Once our baby wa born my oldest sister who I saw once over our mother died drove into town to see the baby she had opened her home to us when his sister had cancer and was very sick we drove she pulled out the royal carpet for us. So there are some really nice cars in the drive way just family but looks like a party. The friend cimes over with a sick kid coughing new baby i say something nively. She coukd careless about the baby she got a phone my man needs to see forget my family our moment she gotta phone he gotta program right now so what new baby I run this man and he do what I say. Anither public display if disrespect I was about to go Sophia on her. I yelled and lost it in return he kicked my family out. My brothrr in law said I been kicked out of much better places. I packed my stuff and moved out frist chance I could. We are not together I asked the grandmother to watch her and the friend called them they in their late eighties to use his pick up truck grandfather to move a stove so she wouldnt have to pay delivery. Grandmother explained what a great friend she has been cook food when her son died and her daughter. I was thinking wow this is where the boundary issues start from the mom down to the son. I dont want my daughter to grow up not being a priority also how to feel that any friend came over for her husband has a right to come in to be disrespectful use house I realize that is this a bad look there’s nothing to f*** men were more respectful than this alleged gentleman and I’ll be back looking at the character of the man and not so much of what I think a man is suppose to be because I never want to be disrespected to level of disrespect I was with degrees!

  26. sofia says:

    Raylene. Just tell Your Husband to end that friendship. Aint nobody got time for that and you shouldnt either!!

  27. Kimberly says:

    I thought I was crazy, but after reading this I’m not. My husband and I have been together 10+ years. He has said that I’m going nuts and that I’m making it a big deal that he has a lot of female friends. These female friends aren’t “friends” that he has met before me either. He does have 1 particular female friend (didn’t meet her before me, probably met 3 years ago). That he and she did have a crush on each other and are now just “bff”. I’ve told him, “what about me? I thought I was your best friend and love life partner?” What should I make of this?

  28. Kimberly says:

    Hi everyone!! I left a comment earlier, but I feel like I just need to vent out and I hope that maybe someone out there can shed some light my way.
    My husband and I have been together 10+ years, he met this female friend, (not actual initials of the female friend SF) approximately 3 years ago. He told me awhile back that he and she did have a crush on each other, and since she didn’t want to ruin the relationship that my husband and I have, they are just close friends. I was jealous with him talking, texting, hanging out with each other, etc. She moved to a different state a 1 year & a half ago to pursue her career dreams. They do still keep in contact, because of the type of business they do. I’m not sure if her moving to a different state helped me with not being jealous of their relationship. He has flown over to see her in that state where she currently lives in. I don’t know if his relationship with this close female friend is really good intentions, now that I know that they did have feelings for each other. He does have a lot of female friends, but this one just hits me in the stomach.

  29. asma says:

    please help me

  30. AnaMarie says:

    I do feel you. In fact when I met a guy that seems nice and could be a friend for my husband as well and find out he’s married I want to know her too. I’m struggling with a very insecure neighbor who seems to think I have eyes for her man. Uh….no! I try to talk to her more as her man is quite a chatty Cathy, but she’s hell bent on thinking he and I are going to run off with each other. Even my husband thinks she’s bananas…and very insecure.

  31. @ebonieezer says:

    We don't even have those types of discussions. Period. Ever.

  32. Renee says:

    I really like this post!! You are on point. I’ve also discussed with my husband on being careful with female encounters. This was maybe 2 years ago we had a random convo about women. My question is that he never brings up females ever trying to approach him at work or anything. Should I ask him if any females at his job ever try to be friends? I only hear him bring up male co-workers. He works for a big company with mostly men and some women.

  33. Anita Alexander says:

    My husband accepted my (2) very close female friends after we go married. One was single and we hung out together at work and on the weekends when he was busy. However, I quickly learned that he was calling her at 2 and 3 in the morning. He worked from that time of the morning until about noon during the day. When I questioned him about it he said they are only friends. So we are no longer friends. Now it has happened again, my friend of 30 years, he has been calling her 3 or 4 times a day. When I questioned her about it she said he was checking on her husband who is a mutual friends of ours who is in a wheelchair and home all day. When I questioned him he said he was calling her about some movies. Both of whichwre lies. I am going to kick her to the curb, but I am wondering since he is the common element in this siutation, maybe I should kick him to the curb.

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  35. MRS. Tournear says:

    I understand completely, my husband actually had is childhood female friend and ex-girlfriend move in with us. I have had to pretty much hold myself back on a lot of things that she does including staying up late at night trying to take over his meds schedule, reminding him of appointments and taking over my house.
    I have told him she has 3 more months before I go postal on her. She's been there at our house for 9 months already!!!!!
    Tell me that ain't a kick to the head!!!!?????

    • tessa says:

      i would have told her she has 3 days to get out. That was ridiculous. Your husband should have never put you in this position.

  36. Lucia says:

    Its nice to hear that its okay to have boundaries! I'm going through this with my husband. He developed a close friendship with a female worker. And I befriended her about a year after she started working there, on my own, because I thought it was the right thing to do. About another year later, I found out that they were both discussing each others marriage problems. We went to marriage counseling and a few days later I saw he texted her an hour after we went to counseling about our session. Thats when I saw the red flag. I had no idea. I was clueless. I got so upset. And then I find out that he would go have coffee with her after meetings.
    Before all this we talked about boundaries with her and he didn't keep that promise. He still thinks he did nothing wrong and that he just needed advice from a friend. I wrote her an email to tell her that what they are doing is wrong and pretty much to back off. And she wrote me a nasty email back giving me advice and pretty much telling me I am clueless and that maybe I should get out more. I am a stay at home mom, so she really made it sound like I need to get a life.

    He denies that she is involved and their friendship is not as close, thats what he tells me. And he has been a much better husband. But it still bothers me that he won't own up to his mistake and that he still has respect and care for her after she hurt my feelings so bad. He thinks she didn't do anything wrong. And that hurts me and I told him and all he had to say is "do you want me to lie to you?". I told him, no, but I want him to agree that she hurt my feelings and that agree that she should have kept her mouth shut. THAT would make me feel like he is on my side. But he tells me that i wrote the email first. Ha. But yet THEY are the ones who started this emotional frienship behind my back.
    Its so hard to deal with. I want to feel like I am his best friend. And I wasn't for a while and its taking time for me to gain his trust and I hate this so much.

  37. Liz says:

    My hubby has an assistant that he started texting maybe up to 100 texts a day after about a year. I wondered how he texted her at night without my knowledge but realized the times were when I was giving our son a bath or putting him to bed. He said he did that because he didn't want to upset me. Most of the texts were work related with about 40 percent personal (non sexual) comments. They told each other about their weekends or things that amused them etc. I found out about the number of texts when he went over his limit. I confronted him on it and also told her that she needed to chill out with the texts. They both (him in person, her on the phone) that it was just a "friend" type of relationship. They insisted she was very happily married. He said he started talking to her because he felt I didn't give him enough attention when our son was born. I was always so preoccupied with our son he felt left out. He called her a "good friend" And that he cared for her "as a friend". He promised he would keep things texts on a more professional level. This was last year.

    Things were fine until a few days ago. I found out that in June, he created an email account so that they could email without my knowing. (His mother sends pictures of us and our son to his "normal" email so I am able to access it). When I found out about the second email account I felt so betrayed. He explained to me that it was so that I would not get upset, not because he was trying to hide inappropriate things. There was nothing inappropriate once again in the emails. Just like the texts, it was about their days, things that amused them etc. However, I also found out that he has her birthday on his phone calendar. She is the only other person other than myself and my son that he has there. Not even his family. I told her I knew about the emails and she stated she is upset, that he gave her the email address but did not tell her it was ONLY for her. She said she did not know it was a secret email. She said she would no longer use that email and that she would use his normal email and for work stuff only. He has again promised he would cut off the personal stuff. He would give her up as a friend because my son an I were the most important to him in his life.

    Now I am waiting to see if some months from now, I will find a new email address, or who knows, maybe a "secret" phone that he is using to contact her so I wouldn't know "so I won't be upset." I no longer trust my husband regarding this girl. The thing is, I do believe her that she is just his friend. It's my husbands feelings for her I don't trust. Is he obsessed with her? I don't know.

  38. Liz says:

    My hubby has an assistant that he started texting maybe up to 100 texts a day after about a year. I wondered how he texted her at night without my knowledge but realized the times were when I was giving our son a bath or putting him to bed. He said he did that because he didn't want to upset me. Most of the texts were work related with about 40 percent personal (non sexual) comments. They told each other about their weekends or things that amused them etc. I found out about the number of texts when he went over his limit. I confronted him on it and also told her that she needed to chill out with the texts. They both (him in person, her on the phone) that it was just a "friend" type of relationship. They insisted she was very happily married. He said he started talking to her because he felt I didn't give him enough attention when our son was born. I was always so preoccupied with our son he felt left out. He called her a "good friend" And that he cared for her "as a friend". He promised he would keep things texts on a more professional level. This was last year.

  39. 3yrWifey says:

    What if the other "friends" are his over-bearing sisters and mother. 1 of them is married, 1 has a long-distance marriage, his mom is married, one is divorced… they all depend on him for EVERYTHING. It is ridiculous, how can I get them ALL (including him) to understand that he already has a leading lady and it ain't the one who popped him out 31 years ago?

    • Tracy says:

      To 3yrwifey – please NIP IT in the bud ASAP. My sister is going through it bad with her hubby and his mom cuz she never put her foot down way back when and they have been married 13 years and together for like 20. Please take them all to lunch and tell them how it is. There can only be one king and queen!

  40. Mrs. Potter says:

    This post is great! I am in a disaster like situation, where my Husbands friend tell him, “she can’t be his friend aslong as we are married”. I had to let him know they are a bit to comfortable with each other for me. Him being a man ran back and told her (I think she wants him). Otherwise, I have reached out to her to go do girl stuff, but she declined. She calls me all kinds of names to my Husband, but at the end of the day I set the parameters for my marriage. And as I told him, there is no way anything is going to be cool with us aslong as she is only befriending him, and not me. I like the girl but she has over stepped her boundaries with my marriage. He doesn’t understand, its not going to be the same between them like in High School (yes I have known my Husband longer then her). She calls him complaining about how it will never be the same, like your blog says, get your own man. I am just unsatisfied with his inability to understand the problem. I made my effort but she will not be around if she doesn’t learn me. Is that wrong somebody? He told her he would stop by without me so she could see our newborn. This is a persistent problem, where do I go? Or just stick to my parameters? (Sigh)

  41. Lisa says:

    My husband and i fight about this all the time. My thought? If you want to go for a drink after work watch the game etc… call one of your guy buddies. WHY do you need women? Am i NOT enough for you?
    Having said that i admit he’s outgoing tales to everyone and he’s the one that gives out his number to friends. The problem is when he tells them he’s not interested in more than friendship But they keep putting on pressure. He should walk away but never wants to hurt feelings. Also when a single woman texts a married man late at night It’s NOT ok. Especially when she’s been told upsets the wife.
    Men and women being friends? I DON’T like it but i can live with it IF there are boundaries. And whether it be him having female friends or her having male friends those friends MUST respect the other friends family as spouse!!!!

  42. Beeeeee says:

    I personally think it's amazing how little women trust their husbands. My man has lots of platonic female friends. He hugs them in front of me and they talk and he says your amazing and I luv ya all there time. There are a few things though… Private things, things he only says to me. But otherwise I'm totally cool with it as he is cool with me having guy friends. We tease eachother all the time for instance I'll say hey babe, girlfriend # 2 text u yet today? Lol and he does the same. They don't have to know me. They are his friends. And my friends are my friends although there is lots of overlap but I think it's healthy for a guy to have an outside friendships with girls and guys. My man has both as do I. I trust my fiancé completely. He gave the ring to me. He loves me and I'm the only one for him. But if we didn't allow outside friends and family relationships and time away from eachother, well there would be a whole new set of criminal charges and bodies! Ok? Wed kill eachother after a month! I love him and I trust him. But I'm not paranoid and/or obsessed. He is the main man in my life, but my
    I've doesn't revolve around him. Haha he always says but you need me and I say hahahah. No. Listen bud. I got along fine for 26 years ( we met a year ago, I'm 27 he's 28) before you ever came along so no I don't need you. I love you and I want you but I don't need you. He acts pouty teasing me, but in reality he respects me more for it. He says he doesn't need me either but he wants me and I say brilliant! Ladies please for gods sake,Stop being so insecure! Trust your husband and more importantly trust yourself! know you can live and live quite well ,without him, even though you wouldn't ever want to. <3

  43. nancy says:

    Greetings to every body that is reading this testimony
    Me and my boyfriend were seriously in love for six years and we were planning to get married but one day he came to my house and told me he was no longer interested in our relationship simply because he was dating another rich lady who promise to buy him a car and to sponsor their wedding. And i suffer heartbreak for seven months and i was not tired of loving him.so i take a bold step by contacting a spell caster who help me bring my ex boyfriend back. he is powerful and great his contact is Kumalovespell@gmail.com you can also contact him for help

  44. elene says:

    Thank you Dr.ekpen for what you have just done in my life, for helping me get my husband who left me with two kids years ago, I thank you so much the great Dr.ekpen for Bringing back my family i am grateful and will always be if you also Need his help his email My name is Elene Jones I am from england i want to share my happiness with the general public of what Dr.ekpen has done for me of India but now in Africa has done for me in the last few weeks i was once in love this guy called Mcjohe we in love with each other until traveled out of my state for two years and we promise ourselves to be together forever, but before i return from my journey he has already find another lover , when i try to come back to him and plead for apology , He shun me and send me away , i love him so much that i can not do with out him then i told a friend about it and she advice me and recommend this man Dr.ekpen for me when i visit him at drekpenspelltemple@gmail.com he only ask me to buy some items for sacrifices to help me get my ex back and he actually did it and it work well and today I am happy .
    just in case any one is out there with same problem or any kind , I advice he or she to contact this man today at drekpenspelltemple@gmail.com and with what he did for me I believe he can also help you thank once again Dr.ekpen

  45. Jamara Auchter says:

    I'm so glad my fiancee isn't a social butterfly and doesn't believe in having female friends. He'd rather a woman think he's unfriendly or rude, than to give ME any little thing to be suspicious about. He does not speak to other females, and that's HIS CHOICE, so don't talk to me about "being insecure". He has a personal philosophy that most women intentionally cause little dramas so to eliminate that chance, he LITERALLY won't speak to another woman. That eliminates her EVER being able to say ANY little slick thing to me. Pretty smart, if the goal is to avoid a naggingI girlfriend. I had to ask him a few times to please at least be friendly to my best friends! Bottom line: I love that I don't have "my man has female friend" problems.

  46. stella says:

    Oh my God, I'm so glad to tell everyone the real thing that happen to me…My name is JOAN. If i refuse to share this testimony it means i am selfish to my self and to people i love so much whom might have similar problems, March 16th about something 7:23pm after taken our dinner my husband got crazy started calling a lady name Melisa I love you, i was so mad and started crying like a baby…then my husband left home then for the idiot called Melisa, and never return back home then i believed when he understand his self he will surly come back to apology, but instead he left me So i complained to my friend she told me she was having such problems in her marriage until she was introduce to DR agbadi who specializes in bringing back broken homes and broken marriages DR agbadi cast a spell for me in May 4th surprisingly my husband came home May 6th apologizing that i should forgive him that it will never happen again, i was so glad and gave the thanks to DR agbadi who save my marriage, if you are having similar problem you can contact him and His email address is (dragbadilaguspelltemple@gmail.com) you can still save your marriage if u really love your husband.
    Thanks joan

  47. stella says:

    i want to give thanks and i will always give thanks to DR.agbadi who brought back my love that has left me for 6years within 48hours, i have said about this last week but i promised to always tell people about this every week end so that those that did not read about it last week will read about it this week, i have been looking for how to get this boy back to my life because i love this boy with the whole of my heart, i could not replace him with any body,one day i was watching my television when i saw a lady giving thanks to DR.agbadi and telling the world how he helped her i was so shocked i could not believe it because i never taught that there are powers that can bring back lost love, then that was how i decided to contact him too because i do really need my love back,when i contacted him i told him everything and he told me not to worry that my love will surely be back to my arms within 48hours at first i could not believe because i was thinking how could somebody that has gone for 6years come back within 48 hours,so then i decided to watch and see,unbelievable within the next 48hours i got a call from unknown number so i decided to pick the call the next thing i could hear was my loves voice he was pleading and begging me on the phone that i should forgive him that i should forget all that have happened that he did not know what came over him,he promised not to leave for any reason, that he was really sorry for what he did,i was so surprised because i never believed that this could happen,so that was how i accepted his apology and the next morning he came to my house and still pleading for me to forgive him i told him that everything is okay that i have forgiven him, that was how we started again and now we are married, i promised to say this testimony in radio station, commenting this testimony is still okay but before this month runs out i promise to say this in radio station and i will,sir thank you very much.World please am begging you people to try and thank this man for me,or if you need his help here is his email address:dragbadilaguspelltemple@gmail.com or you can also reach him through his mobile number,+2347067607812

  48. Barrackloanfirm says:

    Hello everyone, Hello , my name is Mrs Waiter of Housto texas.I came to this site to share the good works of Dr.Ogbo ( prophetbaz ) . I never believed in love, money spells or magic until I meant this powerful spell caster when I went to Africa in December last year on a business trip. He is very powerful and can help you cast spells to bring back the love of one ` s been lost , bad behavior , lover looking for someone to love you , wealth Money , Winning lottery number, bringing back lost his lover, bring money lost and magic money spell for a good job , I ` m happy and alive testimony now , because the man who had wanted to marry left me 2 weeks before our wedding and my life was turned upside down because our relationship has been for years .. I really loved him, but his mother was against us and no job that pays well . So when I refer to this sorcerer, I told him what happened and he explained the situation of things to it .. At first I was hesitant , skeptical and doubtful , but I just gave it a try . And in five days time when I returned to Texas, my boyfriend (now my husband, Dr. Wallocks ) called me and apologized that everything had been settled with his mother and his family and he has a new job interview so we should get married and gave birth to twins nad I was cured of HIV .. I didn ` t think the sorcerer Because just asked me my name and my boyfriends name and all I wanted to do it did for me … We are happily married and are now expecting our little boy , and my husband also got the new job and life became much better and we became very rich. In case any caster needs some help , email him at this email address : (drogbohighspiritualspellcaster@gmail.com ) …… I hope that helps . Hurry now and contact him via email as :(drogbohighspiritualspellcaster@gmail.com ) .. Thank you very much and I am so happy right now .. Mrs Waiter.

  49. vake says:

    thank you Dr. Simon for bringing back my ex husband that left me and my kids for good 2 years.i don't have much to say i just wanna say a big thank keep on your good work you can also email him at oksolutemple@outlook.com

  50. lisa johnson says:

    my name is LISA JOHNSON am hear to give testimony of how i got back my husband, we got married for more than 9 years and have gotten two kids. thing were going well with us and we are always happy. until one day my husband started to behave in a way i could not understand, i was very confused by the way he treat me and the kids. later that month he did not come home again and he called me that he want a divorce, i asked him what have i done wrong to deserve this from him, all he was saying is that he want a divorce that he hate me and do not want to see me again in his life, i was mad and also frustrated do not know what to do,i was sick for more than 2 weeks because of the divorce. i love him so much he was everything to me without him my life is incomplete. i told my sister and she told me to contact a spell caster, i never believe in all this spell casting of a thing. i just want to try if something will come out of it. i contacted DR KPELEDE for the return of my husband to me, they told me that my husband have been taken by another woman, that she cast a spell on him that is why he hate me and also want us to divorce. then they told me that they have to cast a spell on him that will make him return to me and the kids, they casted the spell and after 1 week my husband called me and he told me that i should forgive him, he apologizes on phone and said that he did not know what happen to him. it was the spell that DR KPELEDE casted on him that make him comeback to me today,me and my family are now happy again. thank you DR KPELEDE for what you have done for me i would have been nothing today if not for HIS great spell. i want all my friends who are passing through all this kind of love problem of getting back their husband, wife , or ex boyfriend and girlfriend to contact {kpeledesolutiontemple@gmail.com} and you will see that your problem will be solved without any delay.This are the few things he also do for people. *HE BRING BACK LOST LOVERS IN 24hrs. *REMOTE CONTROL OVER LOVERS. *ALL TYPES OF SPELL CASTING & VOODOO WORKER. * IS YOUR HEALER TAKING LONG TO SOLVE YOUR PROBLEMS? THIS IS YOUR CHANCE TO BE HELPED QUICKLY. *GET RIDE OF ANY WITCHCRAFT, BAD LUCK & CURSES. * EXPERT IN DISTANCE HEALING *COURT CASES EVEN IF ONE IS CONVICTED[IF THERE'S A CHANCE OF APPEALING] *IS SOME BODY JEALOUS WITH YOUR RELATIONSHIP? *UNFINISHED JOBS BY OTHER DOCTORS-IF NOT SATISFIED-COME TO HIM. *ARE YOU BEING FORCED INTO A DIVORCE? *HE PREVENT BAD LUCK AND JEALOUSY. *TO WIN HORSES AND GAMBLING *HE CAN STOP SOME ONE INTERFERING WITH YOUR RELATIONSHIP. * DO YOU WANT TO HAVE CHILDREN OF YOUR CHOICE *DO YOU WANT QUICK MARRIAGE PROPOSAL? *HE CAN CLEAN PEOPLE HOUSES,BUSINESSES AND PROPERTIES FROM BAD LUCK. *DO YOU NEED EXCESSIVE UAL POWER AND STRONG ERECTIONS. You can get in touch with him through ( kpeledesolutiontemple@gmail.com or +2347038111854

  51. maria says:

    Last week prophetkalito the great spell caster brought my husband home to me suddenly after being divorced for a few years. He had married the other woman but it fell apart and he came back to me after 2days of prophetkalito spell to bring him back and it really work. He came to faith in prophetkalito during this time, even when I tried to give up, prophetkalito always brought me back. I love prophetkalito , who makes all things new .i give him all praise he also specialize in all kind of spell like,
    (1) If you want your ex back.
    (2) if you always have bad dreams.
    (3) You want to be promoted in your office.
    (4) You want women/men to run after you.
    (5) If you want a child.
    (6) You want to be rich.
    (7) You want to tie your husband/wife
    to be yours forever.
    (8) If you need financial assistance.
    (9) Herbal care
    (10) If you can be able to satisfy your wife
    sex desire due to low reaction.
    (11) if your menstruation refuse to come out the
    day it suppose or over flows.
    (12) if your work refuse to pay your, people owing you?.
    (13) solve a land issue and get it back.
    (14) Did your family Denny you of your right?
    (15) Let people obey my words and do my which.
    (16) Do you have a low sperm count?

    contact prophetkalito via email: prophetkalito@gmail.com

  52. maria says:

    Last week prophetkalito the great spell caster brought my husband home to me suddenly after being divorced for a few years. He had married the other woman but it fell apart and he came back to me after 2days of prophetkalito spell to bring him back and it really work. He came to faith in prophetkalito during this time, even when I tried to give up, prophetkalito always brought me back. I love prophetkalito , who makes all things new .i give him all praise he also specialize in all kind of spell like,

  53. justine says:

    ih there
    I found this page by accident….what it’s very interesting….im having the same problem! ! some lady that started chatting to husband…first it was about church gossip….then about random things….then I started noticing the chatting became later…..then! at 00:00…I left it….I though ok maybe its just chatting….well this ladys starts off by saying….hi can you chat now….I mean come….on….what does that mean….hello wife here….so she totally know about me but disregards me here??…..so she now suddenly she having problems…..gues who she talking to….yes my husband!…so again he up at 00:00…and even takes he phone into the bathroom with him!!…you can imagen my face and rage by now….I spoke him about it…I told how I felt about this….”this friend” that I’ve never met before….talks to him untill 00:00 at night….is that right??….I told him its wrong…and that this has really hurt me….anyways…so far so good…its seems like it not happening anymore…I honestly believe there was no bad chatting going on between….I honstley believe that she was having problems……but still talking to a lady I haven’t met untill late at night…..if theres any lady he should up with late at night its me…..il be watching to see if this starts up again….I mean what kind of women chats to another womans husband! !?? late at night……anyways I would appreciate some input on this.
    Justine.bradnick@gmail.com

  54. Maris Williams says:

    Great thanks to Priest Korofo who help me bring back my ex boyfriend…

    My name is Maris, am from London i was in love with a guy called Jermaine will both love each other very much, to cut the story short something happen and he left me for another woman, i love him so much that i always want to be with him, he left me just because i refuse to come to his house when he asked me to come, i beg him to come back but he refuse i tried all my possible best to get him but the more i try is the more i lose him, so i have know choice than to contact a spell caster this was really bad almost all the spell casters scam me and collected my money this was very serious so i contacted one again and i said to my self how long will i continue to be losing money that i don't even have, but when i contacted this email address called greatkorofosolutionhome@gmail.com i told him everything about my boyfriend and how i lost my money he felt pity he was ready to help me he told me that my boyfriend will come back to me and he will be with me forever so i did not trust him when he was telling me, all i thought was that he want to also scam me and collect my money but i just give him a try and it was my last bus stop, i do all the necessary thing he told me to do after then i ask when is he coming back he said i should just relays and wait so i do but i was very panicky in 24 hours time he called me on phone and was begging me to let her come back i accepted her immediately because i love him so much, what would i have done if not for this man, he have prove that not all the spell caster are scam and Haox, he is a real man, so that is how i got my ex boyfriend back.
    Am telling you all out their if there is anybody who can help you is no other person than Priest Korofo his email address is (greatkorofosolutionhome@gmail.com) or you can simply go through his website on http://greatkorofosolutionhome.webs.com he have help so many people i have benefit from it myself and this is the time you will also benefit from him know matter what the problem is and if you are contacting him, tell him your problems and he we be ready to help you.

    Thank you so much Priest Korofo.

  55. Claire says:

    My husband is a westerner and has been working in Asia for two years, i have just recently joined him…because of many reasons….wanted to see if he would like the job and if he would get a long term contract before i quit my job to join him….and more…..
    We would see eachother three times a year…..and would communicate through skype.
    We had a party inviting all his coworkers….suposedly to show his wife and his family off…but throughout the whole party…all we would hear….is him calling his secretaries name all night…..come….see this…taste that….are you ok…joking around with her…etc….he totally forgot about me all night…..i tried to go talk to her and she completely avoided me….even the kids noticed this!!!
    Another situation….a general store close to his place….he would go to often…the women working there knew he was married but alone…so they would offer companionship services…..he told me and the kids about this…laughing it off….but he would call them his friends??? To me those are not friends!!!
    One day his secretary was showing us where to go for a massage be ause i had had neck and back problems….so the three of us are walking on the sidewalk…..he leaves me behind and walks in front of me his wife and walks along her side….the both of them completely forgetting about me….
    He also has a female agent…..i already had some doubts before i got here about this woman….or about him towards this woman….but when i got here…i realised that she even calls him on weekends….this has stopped after she realised i was now at home with him….but what i saw on his skype is that they would talk to eachother late at night and on weekends…about personal stuff….personal comversations….flirting….and she would call him as often as he would call her…..now from what i can see is that she only calls him on workong hours….

    My husband keeps telling there is nothing going on….and that he loves me….and that he wants to end his days with me….

    So i know i am an insecure woman at times and jealous at times…like when he ogles at all these women even when he is with me….
    I realise that it is normal for men to look around….but i also think it is disrespectful to do this while with…it's hurtful for me….

    I just don't want to be that wife that is left behind but kept just because of responsability….
    If he wants more he should leave me and not keep me….

    Should i trust my gut feeling….which is he is crossing professional boundaries and that he is not being completely honest with me?

    Or am i just a paranoid, jealous, insecure woman….making a big deal?

  56. My heart is crushed says:

    My problem is and has been my step-son's girlfriends and /or wife calling to talk with my husband about their finances, health, problems with the step-son, etc. They don't talk with me and usually they call when they know I am at work. he calls them little girl and says love you before they hang up. This week end his daughter was having a get together (just happened to be my husband's birthday) and he told me I could not go because he would have to leave to take me home early to go to work (not true) the current girlfriend was there, although he had said she would not be. This same one spent her time with my husband when we went to the beach together 2 years ago. She also "offered" to ride with him alone on the 12hour trip. She is about 40 years old, divorced, and broke up the step-son and his first wife. I am furious, but mostly deeply hurt that he does not believe me and denies these women are flirting and throwing it in my face because he defends them. My step-daughter was very rude and asked when our family became trash because I said this, about the woman. Husband has not talked with me for 3 days. Any comments are welcome since husband says I am paranoid. I have no one to confide in.

  57. narol denison says:

    Narol Denison

    i am Mrs. Narol Denison from new York. i want to use this medium to congratulate Dr Jatton for the great help of spell he has render to my relationship outbreak. since the past 6 years i was in a relationship problem with my ex, he always get me beating, i never knew he has another girl outside the town, her name is Michel, until i got this great spell caster email address from the internet, so i email him and i laid all my complain to him, he promise me that i am to keep off away from him, and i really agreed on it, but on a condition that my lost ex will be back,,,, he really put some few items which he uses to consulting his great oracle, his plan for my relationship was fulfill and my lost ex was back again within 48hrs… please if you are in such mess today please contact him at drjattosplltemple@gmail.co
    m Mrs Narol Denison

  58. Crystal says:

    My husband reaches out to other women for friendship.He invited them to our home last year.They have been friends for years,I just don't like that he finds their company more interesting than mine.
    I know it is my insecurities,but I still feel betrayed.How can I deal with this?Should I find a guy friend of my own?
    Crystal

  59. Michele says:

    There is a female coworker that has been leaving her department for the past two weeks, just to make small talk. I spotted this girl a mile away and warned my hubby, he said I don't know here she works up front I don't need to talk to her. A moth later while I am leaving his work she is getting called up from his department (he is the only one in that department) and told by a supervisor to stay in her own. Come to find out she been in his department making small talk the last few weeks. I told him how I felt prior to this, his excuse for not telling me is he thought it was ok, due to him not being interested in her. I said then why didn't you avoid her, tell her your busy…His response I don't know, but I didn't see it as a problem for us.

  60. Ann says:

    Last Wednesday my husband picked up his single coworker that for some reason I never heard her name before and took just her to dinner – just sprung it on me. Said the others couldn’t make it. Sort of half a$$ed ask me to go (I was on my way home from work) he said her 5 yr old was going – he didn’t. He asked me if I wanted something I texted him 6 times no reply. 3 hours later no dinner as “they didn’t have what I wanted” and they are just friends. I have been sick and emotionally hurt since. Any advice?

  61. Nyisha says:

    My husband has a female best-friend/ex-co-worker. He knew her before me but it was around the time we were just in our first year of dating that she moved to his neighborhood and they started working on building their friendship (his words). They would see each other about 3x a week. She would invite him to the beach,dancing, shopping or to her house for dinner and call him late at night. All when her fiance wasn't around who my husband new as well. She even offered to give him a manicure. One night my husband made the mistake of telling me she said she knew if she let him he would sleep with her. What kind of a friend says that? That's when I decided to call her. I found out she didn't even know my name (yet hers was a constant ring in my ear) just that he had a girl. I explained to her and her fiance that she was being inappropriate and had cross the line. She said she had no idea I had a problem with her and should talk to my man about it because if her Fiance had a problem with her hanging out with my man she would do something about it. Now I have a male best friend myself and if his girlfriend ever called me saying she had a problem with me I would do everything in my power to make them feel comfortable. I would not want to risk being un invited to their wedding or their baby shower or cut out of their lives (we've been best friends since the 9th grade. I'm 37 now). Anyway her statement sounded like something a home wrecker would say, not a true best friend. So fast forward eight years later she's moved far away and married now and so are we. He constantly text her updates on events in our lives. Last night He reminded her she was his true blue friend and that's why he would never give up on her. That statement hurt. he knows I hate her and yet he doesn't care. He even invited her to our wedding! She didn't come though made up some excuse. I feel disrespected and I know I deserve better and so does he. He needs someone in his live he would go to bat for and clearly it isn't me. I'm I being childish? Because at this point I just want a divorce.

  62. Jill says:

    I went to my husband’s office and noticed that his female secretary had “borrowed” an office decoration that I gave to my husband and it was up in her own office. He also picks up coffee for her when he is getting food for himself. I got mad at him of course, and he got mad at me right back. Am I overreacting?

  63. kate says:

    Thank You Lord. My husband had returned for a month after i came in contact with Prophet James but then left us again. We were devastated and could not understand why the Lord would bring him home just to leave again. Two weeks after he left he returned back a totally different man. I now understand God was still working on him and me. We pray together every night along with reading the Bible. Please don’t ever give up prophet James is always here to solve eevrything . I was about to do just that the week before he returned. Please remember to only listen to the voice of Prophet James I had many friends that week strongly telling me to give up and move on. Thankfully that Prophet James gave me strength to continue praying and standing. Thank You Lord for continuing to help our marriage. Always remember to put the Lord first and trust Him.because Prophet James is a man to trust he his a man sent by God and you can contact him on prophetjameshomeofanswer@hotmail.com

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  66. mel says:

    While I've actually experienced both sides of this {being the wife and being the single woman being preyed upon by married co-workers} I have to say that we need to put the cog back in the wheel, which the cog is the HUSBAND. Now I'm not saying there aren't women who prey upon married guys, of course there are, and they are unrelenting if they find a "victim" who is an easy target. Most married men still desire to be that hero, and they don't care who's eyes they are the "hero" in , their wife, their coworker, their boss, its all about a fragile male ego who doesn't care who they hurt in the process, as long as their ego is fed. And that's the bottom line to all this, its feeding that damn fragile male ego having his wife stressed about another female who may be trying to take his attention away from family. The male ego loves to be stroked, and acting as if he has no clue that these women want his help, attention, and whatever else he's willing to give up, is complete crap! He knows how to turn away a woman. A man who is approached by someone who weighs 300#s or isn't physically desirable, he will have NO problem turning them down, or walking away. My husband was the proverbial "savior" of all womankind. If someone looked lost, or their car was broke down, or just a neighbor who wanted to talk, would approach him, he'd spend his entire afternoon trying to be a hero, then would spend just the same amount of time making sure I heard every lurid detail of his ability to save these poor creatures. Of course, I'd be seething because he just wasted 8 hours of his day doing stuff that did nothing to help us as a couple or a family. When a man is distracted by others, he neglects his obligations as a husband, a father, and your partner. My husband was doing these things because his need for the ego feed was stronger than his obligation to be the man of our house. I spent many years fixing this within his personality, and finally now he gets it! While I still have to remind him when he starts in with his inapprop. interactions, he will stop and remove himself from the situation now with no debate or argument.! Make your man responsible for his behavior and how it affects you and your family!! After all, he is the cog in that wheel!

  67. donna says:

    my husband is a minister and admitted he knows a chick at our church likes him and she is always in his face about something and he knows it bothers me and so does he I even asked her to stay out his face and she wont and he told me to say something to her since it bothers me so much and I will again I explained to him that she is disrespecting me as his wife and that she wont stop until he says something only been married a year and every argument has been about this woman!!!!!!! help!!!!!!!

  68. Annie says:

    Omg lady! The entire time I was reading your article I was all “YES YES YES!!!!” I am so tired of all my husband’s new female “friends”. I’m not blaming all on those girls cause my husband is a SUPER friendly guy (his job requires him to talk to guests all times) so I get it that girls can misunderstand, but these new girls who adds my hudband as a friend on facebook, acting super weird (not even saying hi or introducing themselves to me when I come in or see them outside of his worl when they obviously know I’m the wifey) I think it’s just so weird.. And my husband thinks I’m overreacting.. ALL my male friends, I have two male friends whom I think as my brothers, always asks me how my husband is and they are dying to meet my husband and get to know him! (One lives across the sea, another lives in different side of the states). This is such a small issue, yet bugging me lots quite often!

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