Judging from the many emails and tweets I have received about my rather extended blogging hiatus (thanks for the love, guys!), it’s safe to say my little “break” had started to concern a few of you. Not to worry; We’re fine, and I wasn’t giving up on my commitment “to blog my way through marriage, openly and honestly,” but instead just pausing for a private moment of reflection…
You see, Man and I have been together for almost nine years, and this October we will have been married for two. That means the marriage is still considered “short” but our time together, living and working as a team, has stretched for almost a decade. That means the “newlywed phase,” for us, wasn’t quite what we expected. It wasn’t bad, or terrible — just different.
The thing is, when I started this blog, I said I would share my marriage, both the “good and bad,” with you all, no matter what. But about a year into blogging, I realized something: I wasn’t totally keeping up my end of the bargain. I was sharing almost daily, but only the good, the awkward, and the funny – never the bad or the ugly. (You know, things like: One morning I woke up and told my husband “I feel like I don’t love you as much as I should today,” or the time he bailed on me on Christmas Eve to spend it getting trashed with his friends – yeah, that sort of stuff.)
This is why when we reached that inevitable “rough moment” married couples inevitably do, I kept staring at the blank blog post entry field in WordPress wondering why I felt I had nothing to say. But the truth is, I did have something to say; I just didn’t think it was what I was “supposed” to say. So instead of sharing our truth in that moment, I kept it to myself – something that has felt so strange for me, since I had become so accustomed to the therapy that is blogging and sharing my life lessons and experiences. The trouble with love is, when it’s going well you have so much to say and so many words and when it’s giving you hell (be it for a moment an hour or a week) you sometimes can’t find the words to say what you mean or feel – many times because you yourself just don’t know yet.
As I expected and always knew we would, Man and I rode out that little “wave” this summer together, holding hands and fighting the current and we’ve made it back to bliss beach – for now. And, I’m okay with that, because that’s what marriage and love is – a series of waves that can sometimes carry you forward and other times hold you back or break you apart. What matters is where you end up when the tide settles and what you’ve learned. That said, I realize now, after much, much consideration, that I have more, not less, to give you all on Man, Wife and Dog, and I’m back to show you exactly what I mean. Of course, I’ll still share my little love lists, our décor dramas and triumphs, our big moments and our learning curve secrets. BUT, between all of that you’re going to get a lot more – the rest of the story if you will. The theme is and always will be positivity and growth, but let’s just say some of the shots we’ll be serving will no longer come with a chaser. You up for it? If so, nice to see you again and I hope you come back soon to read what comes next. If not, and you want to continue to live and operate in a world where marriages are like the scripted ones in the movies, that’s cool too. Only, this isn’t a movie. It’s our reality show –so you may not want to tune in moving forward.
Phew! Now that we’ve gotten all of that out of the way: Hello, again! I’ve missed you and I hope to see you again soon. Check back tomorrow and the day after, and the day after that to see what the new and improved Man, Wife and Dog Blog has in store.