Vanessa Bryant Calls It Quits on Her Marriage, Could You Forgive and Forget Your Husband’s Indiscretions?

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Vanessa and Kobe Bryant during his 2003 sexual assualt scandal.

Breaking News: Vanessa Bryant has filed for divorce from husband Kobe Bryant, of the LA Lakers, bringing an abrupt end to their ten-year marriage — a marriage that, as many of you know, was plagued with controversy, scandal, and frequent rumors of his infidelity. According to TMZ.com, Vanessa filed divorce papers this afternoon citing “irreconcilable differences”. These differences, most of America can assume, would be his many alleged infidelities.

Sources say Vanessa suspects Kobe has cheated, again, and after standing by him in 2003 when he was accused of sexually assaulting a Colorado woman, she’s really had it this time. And, can you blame her? I for one felt she showed tremendous courage back then when she publicly stood beside a man who admitted to cheating on her with a woman who was later found to have slept with as many as six men in one evening. I love my husband, but I can’t say that I could forgive and forget such a blatant disrespect to our vows. Yet, Vanessa chose to forgive, and forget. (Many say that 4-million-dollar “I’m sorry” ring he gave her helped a bit.) If Kobe did in fact step out on his lovely wife, yet again, he won’t get any sympathy points from me today. A woman can only stand so much. Loving a man, marrying him, and committing to a life with him, don’t mean you’re doomed to endure his bullshit ‘til death do you part. Cheating once and having it become public knowledge was humiliating enough – having to endure that once more is likely the straw that broke the camel’s back on this one. Kobe obviously took her trust and support for granted – again. Vanessa’s had it. I get that. Good for her!

What do you ladies think? Could you forgive your husband for an indiscretion? If you did it once, could you do it again? What would he have to do to earn your trust again?

To learn more about my thoughts on adultery, read my Open Letter to Homewreckers now.

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19 Responses to Vanessa Bryant Calls It Quits on Her Marriage, Could You Forgive and Forget Your Husband’s Indiscretions?

  1. hiphopmuse says:

    I'm not married yet, but I don't think I could forgive my husband for cheating. To me it's the ultimate form of disrespect, along with abuse and general indifference. Of course I haven't been faced with that situation so I can't say for sure what I would truly do in that situation. But I do strongly feel that cheating is intolerable.
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  2. kita says:

    I can forgive years down the road but I will never forget and that reminder will be constant that's one of the reasons I would never stay with him. Even if I did my whole heart would not be in it anymore because cheating would have taken a piece of it.

  3. Jenn says:

    I honestly don't know if I could forgive. I can't imagine putting up with the publicity of the affair like Vanessa did. Kudos to her for respecting herself, since it's quite obvious her husband didn't.
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  4. @BKGurl208 says:

    One indiscretion I could maybe forgive after logging some serious hours on a therapist's sofa, but repeatedly stomping on my heart and our vows, No sir!! No amount of jewelry can fix that hurt. Good for Vanessa!

  5. Thank, Q says:

    I personally don't believe in 2nd chances, but to each their own. I think if more women dumped their men after he cheated the first time, then men wouldn't be repeat offenders.
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  6. myloverswife says:

    One can never really know how they would handle a situation until they are faced with said situation. In this situation while I’m sure painful, Vanessa is the winner. She has reclaimed her dignity and if what I read ealier is true she’s going to claim half of the Bryant fortune.

  7. I'm with BKGurl. I could forgive one indiscretion, but to continue to cheat is just disrespectful. I'm sure it's even harder when you're in the public eye. Public humiliation is just brutal to me. She stuck by him during a truly embarrassing time. If he didn't learn from that, he'll certainly learn now.
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  8. KnotChocolate says:

    I can't say that I'd stick with my husband if he cheated. But I also think this is one of those situations in which it's easy to speculate a hypothetical situation. I know soooo many women who stick with their cheating men, mainly for financial reasons or because of the kids. I just pray that this situation stays hypothetical for me!
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  9. Attorney2be says:

    I could forgive once but I couldn’t keep forgiving if its a constant thing. At some point you have to let go and let God. If he’s a constant cheater then it’s time to let him be free to live his life. How many times can you play the fool for a person? Cheating is selfish and it appears someone who constantly cheats has no respect for you or your vows.

  10. Nestra says:

    I bet I could, some point after he broke the news. But I would be really hurt for a really long time.

  11. I don't think I could forgive. I think once a cheater always a cheater.

  12. On the outside looking in, I can't say for certain I would leave if my husband cheated on me. There would be a helluva lot of pain if I stayed, and I would constantly question if my reasons for staying are because I'm comfortable with our marriage and if it would happen again. I hope it never resorts to the same situation as Kobe & Vanessa, but it's always a possibility…

  13. Interesting story. i know in the beginning of the marriage we heard lots of negative things about Vanessa. I guess under all the issues going they could not keep it together. You never what you can and can not deal with until you go thru.
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  14. Ronnye says:

    I might be living under a rock. Besides that ugly case in Colorado, I have never heard or read of him cheating. So this came as a total surprise. And I like the dude too…why, Kobe, why? He seems to really love his family. I know, 99% of the time, everything isn't what it seems to be. #disappointed.

  15. I could forgive once but I couldn't keep forgiving if its a constant thing. At some point you have to let go and let God. If he's a constant cheater then it's time to let him be free to live his life. How many times can you play the fool for a person? Cheating is selfish and it appears someone who constantly cheats has no respect for you or your vows.

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  17. n songs says:

    Interesting story. i know in the beginning of the marriage we heard lots of negative things about Vanessa

  18. Shelly says:

    Not all best friends can be become good husband and wife. I can say this because I have seen many couples who were childhood friends, but they decided to end their marriage and apply for divorce because they did not find easy to handle their marital relationship, despite being long time friends.
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