Never mind the kids – men say and do the darndest things too! Here’s a sampling of some of the crazy/silly/funny/just-down-right-wrong things I’ve busted my husband doing recently. Fee free to read and laugh along!
1. Sneaking leftovers in the corner of the kitchen in the middle of the night. (Usually the ones I neatly packed away in a container to take to work.) When I catch him he tries to act like he was just getting some milk.
2. Stealing my fuzzy Christmas socks when he woke up late and couldn’t find two of his own that match.
3. Checking out the lady with the gigantic butt in IKEA, only for me to catch him doing it and call him on it and he say, “I thought I knew her from somewhere.”
4. Trying to cut the extremely long line on Saturday morning at Dunkin Donuts by telling people he has to rush and pick up his kids up from gymnastics class – we have no kids yet.
5. Googling “how to win a fight with your wife” – true story. Google history can tell you a lot in a marriage!
6. Using a Scattegories game box to hold up one side of the couch to fool me into thinking he fixed it like he said he would, so he can buy himself another day.
7. Singing Michael Jackson’s Beat It in the shower – loudly – when he didn’t know I’d come home.
8. Trying to teach the dog to bring him his car keys. (Never gonna happen!)
9. Calling the pharmacist to ask if it’s “really that dangerous to drink while on the medication” he’s taking after I throw out his beer. (I can’t make this stuff up!)
10. Stockpiling water bottles and canned food in the trunks of our cars “in case shit goes down” any time we watched an end-of-the-world type movie the night before.
Is your husband this crazy? Do share!