If Your Marriage Got Pulled Over What Would You Get A Ticket For?

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fake speeding ticketSilly analogies are what The Man and I do best. This one came to us in the middle of a commercial break during last night’s playoff game while we were mastering the art of coexisting. We had so much fun calling out our fake “offenses” that I just had to share. Here they are! (Note: We issued these tickets to ourselves!) What would yours be?

His Tickets

Offense: Failure to be romantic on special holidays.
Fine: No great gifts from The Wife on the next one unless he can do better.

Offense: Speeding through the cleaning process and misplacing The Wife’s stuff.
Fine: Supervised cleaning for one month.

My Tickets

Offense: Ignoring hubby stop signs and working too much in the evenings
Fine: Nightly technology ban one hour before work

Offense: Excessive talking during The Man’s me time.
Fine: Mandatory girls only nights (out of the house) every other Friday.

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11 Responses to If Your Marriage Got Pulled Over What Would You Get A Ticket For?

  1. alovelydai says:

    Ooh this is a good one:

    My offense: Not giving no damns about my car's (really his car) appearance.
    Fine: A full summer of car washes.

    His offense: Not listening to me when I tell him to watch out.
    Fine: 2 inch gash on his back (yup happened this morning).
    My recent post The One Where The Hubby Doesnt Listen &amp Injures Himself

  2. princessofgeekadonia says:

    LOL @ alovelydai (not giving no damns). Too funny!

  3. christinacjones says:

    I love this!

    My offense: Tweeting during our "us" time
    Fine: Twitter ban during designated times!

    His offense: Leaving his dirty clothes on the bedroom floor.
    Fine: me NOT picking it up. It will stay there, unwashed, until he takes it to the hamper where it belongs!
    My recent post Lemons to Lemonade

  4. @BrothaTech says:

    My offense: Not flushing the toilet completely and leaving (what she calls) "presents" behind
    Fine: Bathroom cleanup duty for a month (we have FOUR bathrooms)

    Her offense: Touching the car windows with her grubby, makeup-caked hands
    Fine: Taking her own damn car to get washed for a change

    DON'T TOUCH THE WINDOWS!!!
    My recent post Square Moves Towards Mobile Wallet Reality with Card Case

  5. TheProDiva says:

    Hilarious! Let me add one of my own:

    His Offense: Not loading the dishwasher when he says he is, even when I said I would do it if he is not going to do it!
    Fine: Me not cooking….that way, there are not dishes…go on ahead to Burger King!
    My recent post NetworkingMy Confession

  6. What a cute idea for a blog post! Your GNO fine didn't seem like much of a fine, tho. I think most girls would do the offense to get that one. LOL!

  7. NYStateofMom says:

    Oh this is great!

    His Offense: Dumping his dirty laundry in a corner under everything else.
    Fine: Only doing my and the baby's laundry for a month, He'll stop when the boxers go missing lol.

    My Offense: Tweeting and wanting to have the baby with us even during "us" time.
    Fine: Weekly date nights without the little one or convo related to said little one
    My recent post I Almost Clicked the Button

  8. Kit says:

    His offense: Sitting on his ass watching TV all day while the kids are at school and then suddenly discovering "urgent projects" the minute they get home from school.
    FINE: A Honey Do list that includes specific scheduling

    My offense: Asking him to do something and then complaining when he does it "wrong."
    FINE: Doing whatever it is for a week without complaining.
    My recent post Sex Homework- YES- YES- OH GOD YES!

  9. What a cute idea for a blog post! Your GNO fine didn't seem like much of a fine, tho. I think most girls would do the offense to get that one. LOL!

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