In recent laughable celebrity news, actress Cameron Diaz attacked the idea of marriage in her newest Maxim interview. Known for bouncing from one Hollywood hunk to another, when asked about her thoughts on tying the knot Diaz told the magazine, ” I think we have to make our own rules. I don’t think we should live our lives in relationships based off traditions that don’t suit our world any longer.” Well now, that’s interesting, because I think married life suits me just fine and I’ve certainly been known to break a rule or two in my relationship.
Now I’ve already made it clear that I don’t think all women want to get married, and that’s perfectly fine with me. Why should they have to feel they should? But, on the flip side, who can say that no woman should want to get married? I find it fascinating that someone who’s never even been asked for her hand in marriage feels comfortable commenting on why being married doesn’t “suit” the modern day woman. (Plus, I think we all know at least one woman who claimed she didn’t believe in marriage until someone asked her, and then she was your regular ecstatic bride-to-be.) If you don’t get anything else from my daily ramblings and rants please know this, I believe wholeheartedly that your marriage is what you make it and you should customize a marriage to work for you and your spouse. I am pro marriage, but more importantly pro happiness. When it comes to marriage, if you like it, I love it.
Now that that’s out of the way, can I just say that reading this little news bit also reminded me of some great advice I got from a married friend when I told her I was engaged? She said, “When you’re married remember that good girlfriends can give bad advice when it comes to marriage, especially if they’re not yet married.” This is so true, and Cameron’s little quote is the perfect example of this. I do love my girlfriends and they so often give guidance and insight that does help me within my life and my marriage, but sometimes the not-yet married ones’ words aren’t always the gems one might hope they’d be! (Sorry girls, but it’s true!)
Here are some examples of some bad advice I’ve gotten from good girlfriends:
“He screwed up your birthday last year so who cares if you don’t do anything for his this year?” – Love should never be tit for tat. Case closed.
“Your husband doesn’t need to know your every move girl!” – No, he doesn’t need to know, but he should. We’re a team and it’s impossible to function properly as one if one half of that team has gone rogue.
“If you don’t keep an eye on your weight you might lose your husband.” – If I thought my husband was the type of man who would walk away because I went up two dress sizes I wouldn’t have married him in the first place. On the slip side, if I was the kind of woman with self esteem so low that I obsessed about my weight all the time he wouldn’t have married me either.
“If you don’t keep pushing, pushing, pushing, he’ll never do what he’s supposed to do.” Oh yeah? Or I could push to hard and push him right away. Then he’ll be doing what he’s supposed to for some other woman.
The moral of this post? Proceed with caution when acting on advice from friends who can’t yet relate because they haven’t yet walked a mile in your stilettos. Okay? Happy Monday!
What’s the worst advice a single girlfriend ever gave you?