10 Things I Can Do to Make My Husband Happy That Wont Make Me Any Less

Share the Love

I got schooled on a new concept today and it inspired me to write this list and to pass along the lesson. Wifey blogger and author Paula over at Spousonmics, my latest wife blog crush, posted a list like this of her own on her blog today along with a little lesson on “pareto efficiency”. What the heck is that you ask? Paula says it “means there’s no simple change that would make either person happier, or just as happy.” Translation? If your marriage were pareto efficient is would be “perfect” because there would be nothing either of you could actually do to make each other happier or just as happy – you’d already be there.

Though it has a nice ring to it at first, if you think about it, what would you do if you knew you couldn’t do anything to make your husband any happier in a moment, or minute, or day? You’d probably freak out and feel inadequate or unnecessary all at once – even though technically it would mean you’d already done a damn good job! – and that would be very uncool. Lucky for me, like most wives I’m sure I’ll never have that problem. If you ask my husband, I’m sure he’ll tell you that there’s always something I “could” do to put an extra big smile on his face. That being said, here’s a little list of ten of those things I came up with:

1. Not dump the contents of my purse out on the dining room table and then just leave it there for days.

2. Agree to curl up with you and watch an action flick or political thriller instead of always refusing to watch the or just purposely going right to sleep.

3. Drink an entire glass of juice instead of just sipping it down to half and then leaving it sitting somewhere for you to find it.

4. Stop telling you how to drive.

5. Lay in bed with you for at least a little awhile when you’re trying to fall asleep instead of just blowing you an air kiss from the office and yelling “goodnight honey”.

6. Not lecture you on how much you’ve had to drink when we’re out and about and you’re just trying to have a good time.

7. Let you talk through the good part of the movie without complaining as I rewind.

8. Stop worrying more about The Dog’s diet and health habits than cooking us a good meal.

9. Not blame you for moving every single thing I lose track of.

10. Share less of our personal business with my father.

Want more “lessons” you can apply to love? You can pre-order a copy of Paula and Jenny’s book Spousonomics — I did!

What would be on your list ladies?

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4 Responses to 10 Things I Can Do to Make My Husband Happy That Wont Make Me Any Less

  1. You haven’t got the definition of Pareto efficiency quite right. It doesn’t mean perfect — far from it. It’s more like not blatantly ignoring no-brainer improvements. A no-brainer improvement is something that makes you *both* better off (or at least one of you better off with no skin off the other’s nose).

    So you could be Pareto efficient but still have huge improvements possible. Pareto efficiency is the first step: anything you can do to make your partner happier that’s no skin off your nose (or makes you happier too!) you should definitely do. Like I said, no-brainer. But there are also things you can do to make your partner happier that *is* skin off your nose. Then the question is what’s Socially Efficient. It’s socially efficient if it helps your partner more than it hurts you, in which case, again, you should absolutely do it. (But in that case you should get something in return for the sacrifice. Which you probably do.)

    In summary, Pareto efficiency is the bare minimum. What you really want is Social efficiency. *That’s* the ideal, the hypothetical perfect marital bliss.

    An Economics Nerd

  2. Najat says:

    Lol! Definitely #3 and #7 I should stop. Aw, I love this post. I love how you are so genuine on this blog! I will definitely have to get a list together. I don't have time now but I'll be back! :)

  3. ManWifeDog says:

    Thank you Najat and Daniel. Glad you two stopped by and left some thoughts. :-)

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